I am "Mom" to four fabulous, entertaining children, who always provide me with something to write about. I am a lover of sports, the written word, and especially my family. Sarcasm is my best friend. While I work full time, my true passion is writing.

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Say What?

Shannon, my 14-year-old, thinks I am hopelessly old-fashioned. She razzes me about my penchant for capri pants, the fact that my van is no where near an Escalade with rims, and that when faced with a dressy occasion, I often opt for pearls. My biggest faux pas, according to Shannon, is my inability to “speak cool”.

For instance, it is my understanding that when I witness my son make a spectacular baseball play, my response should be that he made a “tight” play. If he turns a double play, for example, and it wins the game for his team, that would be “sick”.   Apparently, my vocabulary is decidedly unhip.

Shannon, herself, speaks to me mainly in adverbs. I hear “obviously”, “really?” and “seriously?” all the time. Wait. Say each one of those words out loud, slowly, with total contempt while rolling your eyes. That’s Shannon-speak.

What’s funny is I remember when I was growing up, we spoke an entirely different version of English than the kids today, which I guess is not that unusual. But I can just imagine my kids’ reactions if I were to respond to Shannon’s adverb-laden eye rolling with “I am so sure, Shannon”, or to my son wanting to try a new trick on his skateboard with an enthusiastic “go for it!” I think, just for fun, I will gauge my teenagers’ reactions when I break a fingernail and exclaim “Shozbot!” , ala “Mork & Mindy”.

So, when it comes right down to it, my speech is missing the “cool factor”. Even though Shannon and I don’t speak the same tongue, I hope she will listen to me when I give her advice. Maybe she will realize that even though I don’t communicate on her level, even though my pearls may be old-fashioned, my “pearls of wisdom” are not.

Shannon and Jackie at a wedding

Shannon and her pearl-wearing mom

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Comments (10)

  1. Rplb1967 09/20/2010 at 4:25 am

    Awesome Jackie! I know what you mean! If I try to talk like them they always say…..Ummm Mom, no! LOL I love your blogs….Keep up the Fantastic work. 🙂

  2. Allison Goodrich 09/17/2010 at 6:32 am

    Beautiful! Love your Pearls of wisdom Jackie!!!!!

  3. Mahgwet 09/17/2010 at 2:31 am

    OMG..what about “that's so tubular-dude” – Cardiff-speak!

  4. Allison Goodrich 09/17/2010 at 12:32 am

    Beautiful! Love your Pearls of wisdom Jackie!!!!!

  5. Mahgwet 09/16/2010 at 8:31 pm

    OMG..what about “that's so tubular-dude” – Cardiff-speak!

  6. PK 09/16/2010 at 6:49 pm

    Yo, as long as she isn't chasing hood rat babydaddies or scoring hood scratch to get baked, getting all up in your grill, or getting balled up, then I guess you're tight. Or should I have said sick? I'm so out of touch <sigh></sigh>

  7. Shutterbug 09/16/2010 at 6:23 pm

    Well, see, my 13 and 9 year olds are Mork and Mindy fans and they don't use any of the “in” language, except in parody. They are Osmond fans and their favorite TV show is Get Smart! I've had quite an influence on them. 🙂

  8. Lori V 09/16/2010 at 4:59 pm

    I feel your “mom of teen daughter pain” times 3! The phrase I hear most is “Mom,PLEASE don't say that again” in response to me trying to speak their language!

  9. erinoltmanns 09/13/2010 at 8:02 pm

    Capri pants aren't cool?! Crap. I feel like our lingo at least made sense. Some of the comments I see posted on Facebook from younger family members totally confuses me.

  10. erinoltmanns 09/13/2010 at 2:02 pm

    Capri pants aren't cool?! Crap. I feel like our lingo at least made sense. Some of the comments I see posted on Facebook from younger family members totally confuses me.